What are we trying to prove to others

What are we trying to prove to others? In the middle of traffic, we are just a one big mass moving from place A to B. We can’t stand when someone comes to our way or slowing us down. It’s always the same: my life, my career, my dreams, my money, my well-being, and the list goes on and on. How you’re supposed to gain respect from others if you’re not giving a thing to them?

People are unsure about themselves. They are blaming somebody else for their mistakes and they refuse looking deep into the mirror. If you’re recognizing yourself from above this post is for you.

Stop judging others

I consider judging as a cry for help. When you’re doing that out loud you are only showing your own weakness. And that means you are suffering from low self-esteem. People like to blame others and judge because their ego needs it. They need to feel better. To feel better their ego needs someone to be beneath, with your ego above.

Next time when someone is attacking you verbally, smile back. See what happens. I’m pretty sure that your attacker is just trying harder to attack you. Why? Think about it. His ego needs your reaction to feel better. When you’re giving back a smile it confuses this attacker usually.

You can’t get if you don’t give

That is the universal law. Life is full of opportunities. You just have to treat others as you would like to get treated by them. Pretty simple. No one is getting in your way. Nobody is going to stop you pursuing your dreams. The only one who is doing that is you. It’s all in your mind. Don’t let others hold the key to your peace of mind.

Give a little space for yourself

In our hectic society, we often let stress suck the life out of us. You’re surrounded by stress. But don’t let that get it to you. I strongly suggest meditation at this point. And the music of course. Take a little slice from your time schedule and turn your focus inwards and just enjoy the moment. It can feel hard at first but practicing meditation and self- awareness you will get amazing results that will increase your well-being. You can use everyday situations as examples.

Here is one:

Maybe you have noticed that you always wake up late and you are in a hurry going to work. You feel stressed. You are checking your watch all the time. Your morning feels like a living hell. After all that morning struggle you end up being late. So here is a simple solution for you. Wake up earlier! Life is not all about managing from task to task. Your day is full of tasks. Even when you are doing this one task, you are already thinking the next one. What kind of life is that? Enjoy your morning coffee at peace. In silence. Meditate if possible. Just let yourself wake up without being in a hurry. Pay attention to all your doings. When you’re going out, feel the morning breeze. If it’s raining, feel the rain. Like Bob Marley said: Some people feel the rainothers just get wet.

You get my point. Bravo, now you have given a little space for yourself already.

Can I boost my self esteem

Weekly shorties: About self esteem

The answer to this question is definitely YES! Of course, you can. It’s all in your mind. Take a deep breath and ask yourself a question: Who I am? What is that question anyway. What are the first things that pop from your mind? Your name maybe. Maybe you’re answering to this question with relationship status or your job title. You are what you’re believing who you are.

Very often we are seeing ourselves through the eyes of the others. No, It’s better this way: We think we are seeing ourselves through the eyes of the others. The first sentence is not true. People are what they are. When they see you, they are making a mental picture of you in their own minds. It is not who you are either. Everyone has a different picture based on their perspective of the world. It’s not real, It’s in their minds so please and stop thinking about them. This life is about you. When you’re suffering from low self-esteem, you are suffering because you care too much what other people are thinking about you. How they see you. You’re seeing them as a threat.

We are living in a society which is based on “norms”. What is normal and what isn’t. But don’t believe in these norms. Behind them is only a handful of people who are deciding which is normal and which isn’t. If you rely on them, your life is full of suffering. A better way to say this is: Just be yourself. Be what you want to be. If someone doesn’t like it, so what. That is their problem.

I know that this is easier said than done, but when you realize this, I guarantee you will get an “a-ha” feeling from this what I’m talking about here.

Live, love and be yourself.

Try to understand instead of judging

Yesterday I was seeing my son and we were on a bus going to the mall. My son sat in a stroller and I stood next to him. When the bus stopped to the subway station we were first to leave the bus. We waited for the bus doors to open. There was this one lady who was behind us. She looked nervous and impatient. I guess she didn’t like us being in front of him. Maybe she was in a hurry.

My guesses hit the right spot. At that moment when the bus doors opened, this lady almost jumped over our stroller and started running. She was in a hurry to catch a subway to the inner city. The funny thing here is the fact that you can catch a  sub to the inner city like every five minutes. So in a hurry? Really?

This kind of encounters happens very often. It’s funny but also very sad.

Egoistic machines

Through time we have become egoistic animals running after money and trying to catch time. When we are drowning in our own shadow we are forgetting kindness and empathy towards other people.

There is a universal law that works this way: what you give is what you get. But people won’t seem to realize that. You prefer more to be a narcissistic person.

How can you protect yourself from these modern day issues? Stress, anxiety, and selfishness are highly infectious in our society. Especially when you face them every day.

Remember, you’re not perfect either

Whatever you do, try to not judge these people. It is very easy to divorce yourself from other people and start thinking that you’re better than them. The result is the same. Know one thing: you are not perfect either. Even if you have raised your consciousness above to much higher levels than others, don’t treat them like they are below you. I say because this has happened sometimes to me. Yes, I’m not perfect either. I’m just a man, pretty simple man at the end. This kind of mindset will only bring sorrow and anxiety to your own life.

You can’t manage here on this planet earth if you despise people who just doesn’t share the same life view as you.

Understand yourself

What I said earlier about our little bus incident, that busy woman made me angry. Why you are in such a hurry. You almost hit your knee to my children. What is wrong with you?! You stupid *****!

It’s easy to judge others when getting angry. But is it worth it? Who will benefit from that?

Instead, try to understand other people. They are products of our own environment. We all have problems. We are living in a very chaotic world. Others have found peace within themselves and others are still lost in their egoistic and stressful minds.

At least you can try.

Introduction to meditation

Introduction to meditation

Nowadays meditation is much common than before. I would like to say that it has become more like a trend today. There are many mindfulness and yoga courses everywhere in the world. What the best thing is, you can access this ancient knowledge very easily. You don’t even have to go to the library and borrow tons of books. You have access to everything you need to know about meditation and yoga online. That is awesome in our world today. All information there is available, you only have to reach that.

Benefits

Meditation has many great benefits which improve your psychical and mental state. And lots of those benefits are scientifically proved. Here are some of them.

Meditation
-Reduces stress
-Reduces anxiety
-Improves Cognition
-Reduces blood pressure
-Slowing biological aging
-Helps to sleep better

And still I run into people, who are very skeptical about meditation and they urge to keep it some mambo jambo. They are raising their eyebrows when I say that I meditate. There are also groups that keep meditation even dangerous, mostly they are fundamental religious groups.

It’s state of awareness and consciousness

To be straight meditation is more like a state. In that state, your awareness and consciousness are turned inward. You are getting rid of all distractions of the outer world and turn your mind on to yourself. This way you can get to know yourself better and understand your emotions and thoughts. You will also start to see that you are not your thoughts. You are the consciousness witnessing those thoughts.

Our mind is never silent. There are constantly different thoughts coming and going. When you learn to calm your mind through meditation, you’ll start to see things in a whole another perspective. There are lots of different meditation techniques. Others are focused on some mantra that you repeat in your mind or out loud. When you focus on that mantra, your thoughts won’t wonder. That is the point and its purpose.

When you reach a state of meditation, you star to feel the deep connection to everything in the universe. You feel that you are the universe itself. You are Filled with love, understanding, calmness and divine connection to all life. That is what makes meditation so awesome.

There are much more than we see

In our society, almost everything is based on how we ”see” things. Our mind is filled with images. Then we are emotionally reacting on those images. We are living in the hectic world filled with stress. There are also much depression, anxiety, sleeping problems and different disorders. We are too often medicating ourselves with pills than naturally changing our lifestyle. But that’s the big business to pharma, right.

Start with this simple technique

I will introduce now to you a very easy and simple technique to meditate.

First, sit in a crossed leg posture keeping your back straight. Turn your chin little bit up and look between your eyebrows. Close your eyes. Repeat mantra in your mind. It can be a word or a short sentence. Now breath calmly in with your belly and repeat that word or a beginning of that short sentence you made up. Then breath calmly out and repeat that word again or finish your sentence. Repeat this for a while until you feel that you are very relaxed and calm. Believe me, you will notice that. When your mind is still just in that moment. If emotions and thoughts start to rise you can just let them go. Don’t focus on them. Just let them come and go naturally. If your mind starts to wonder too much or you will tense up again, focus on your breath and mantra again. You can do this as long as you want to.

Why it’s important to meditate

There is so much trouble in the world. There is so much hate, anger, corruption, sadness, violence among us. That is only because we don’t understand our true nature. We let our greed and ego control us. That causes all horrible things that humankind has done in the past and is doing now. I know that this may sound corny but if everyone would decide that they’ll start to meditate from this day on, there would be no suffering in the world. When people know their true nature they don’t attack other countries, they don’t spread hate and violence, they don’t offense people. When your mind is at peace, how can you hate somebody or kill all life around us what we are doing now? Through meditation, you will reach spiritual awakening.

So feel free to try it, it doesn’t cost a thing. I am open for comments.

Tips dealing with negative people

Tips dealing with negative people

First of all, I would like to say is that never, I mean NEVER give away the key to your own peace of mind. So don’t let others sabotage your peaceful state.

Negative people everywhere

We are surrounded with them. Read the newspaper and think this: Are there any news filled with positivity. Nope. The sad truth is that negativity sells. That is why I rarely follow the mainstream news today.

Also, Everywhere you go you meet negative people. They are usually always blaming somebody, but they don’t have courage to look in the mirror. Here is something on how you can deal with them.

It’s not personal

If this negative person is trying to get you down to his level just ignore it. If they are saying something offensive to you, always remember that it is not about you. When they are offensive against you, they are only offensive against themselves. They need to fulfill what their ego wants. They need to feel better than you. It’s ego that talks, not a person itself. So if you just can, ignore it. Silence is the best weapon against these types of people. It’s never personal. So remember that.

Don’t let it get to you

Especially in work community, when one guy starts to speak out negative thoughts It’s easy to fall into that negativity mindset too. In a blink of an eye there is ten people filled with negativity blaming everyone else and talking bad. Don’t let them bring you down to their level. You can say something cheerful to them but if it’s not working, just let it be. Get away if possible and avoid conversations with these persons. Or just smile at them and laugh, that will left them confused.

Get out of negative relationships or work with it

If you have a friend who is always the negative type, what this kind of friendship is offering to you? I recommend that you talk about it and set things straight. It’s not so easy, but it’s worth it. If your relationship is based on negativity It’s not going to carry any fruit to you. So get rid of it and move on with your life.

Smile

We are so serious every time when we are on our way to work or home. If you feel that you are surrounded by serious lifestyle, you can always smile. It doesn’t cost a thing. This way you are giving more positive energy in the world. Sooner or later somebody smiles back. That, my friend is what I’m talking about.

What about you? How you deal with these type of people?

How to self help with depression

How to self help with depression

Depression is like a western plaque. Exhaustion, losing pleasure, melancholy, thoughts regarding death, sleeping problems and feeling of guiltiness. Nobody wants these feelings in life. If you are going to see a doctor because depression, usually they give you a recipe for some pills. “Don’t worry, everything is going to be okay, just take your pills.”

Then you are taking them everyday thinking that your state is somehow soon to be fixed. You don’t even try to do nothing else about it. There are lots of information about depression medication, on behalf and against. I’m not going into that now.

I was struggling with depression before. Everyday I woke up and didn’t feel motivation at all. Usually I was falling into a dream again. Often it felt like my dreams were an escape route from this world. I didn’t have a job then either. I felt no reason to wake up at all. So yes, I have experience of that.

There is no simple answer on how I was healed from it. Is there a cure really? Aren’t all of us depressive sometimes. More or less.  I think the final turning point was when I met my future baby mama and realized that she was pregnant.

Here are some simple things you can do to relieve depression.

Think twice before taking your medicine

If you go to see a doctor because of your depression, first thing they do is recommending  pills for you. In my opinion this kind of approach is wrong. There are lots of ways we can do by ourselves to decrease depression, even heal it. But those ways are not serving big pharmaceutical companies. I’m not telling you what to do, I’m just saying It’s not necessarily the only and right choice.

See psychologist

I have been received very useful tools to control my life and my emotions through therapy. You don’t have to be on depression medication to see a psychologist. Only blockade here is your financial situation. If you have no money to afford, skip this.

Read

filled with very good self help books. If you don’t know where to start, check out my Recommended books page. By reading you will learn about to know yourself better. And that helps to find cure to your depression. World is filled with very inspiring books. It’s all about self knowledge. We were born here on planet earth to learn. Learn about your emotions and actions, meditation and yoga, law of attraction, awakening of the soul. I will quarantee that if you look into these topics your serotonin levels are going up. Of course, just reading won’t do anything, you have to be open to receive this knowledge as well.

Meditate

I have told here on my site many times how important it is to meditate if you want to increase your happiness. For example, try this one.

Force yourself to do something

When you are depressed, all activities can feel overwhelming to you. You feel that you just want to stay home and do nothing. But more you live doing nothing, the harder it is to get rid of your state. So, force yourself to do something. For example go for a walk or running. Getting started can feel very hard, but when you manage you will be revarded emotionally.

Have you suffered from depression in some point of your life? If yes, how did you beat it?

 

 

 

How to be happy in your life

How to be happy in your life

Every moment in our life happens right now. I must say to you again and again, that when we are thinking yesterday or tomorrow’s burdens, we don’t live in this moment. Even if your life situation is so great, try at least to be happy. Even about little things. Perhaps you didn’t know but you have much what other people have not. Do you have fatal disease? Are you going to die soon? Are you living in the streets? Are you hungry? If your answer for these questions are NO, then you have a lot of things to be grateful for. If you want to increase your happiness, be grateful for what you have. In this post I will share couple of little tips what you can use to increase your happiness level. First of all…

Happiness increases through gratefulness

When something very vital to our life in this planet is suddenly taken from us (for example basic need: water), only then we are starting to appreciate it. When we are having it we don’t really think about it. If you can think about it this way. Maybe if you start to appreciate it even when you have it? That would be the way.

Can you come up with things to be grateful for? I am grateful that I have an apartment to live in. I get my paycheck twice a month (it’s not much but still..) If you can do a list of things you are grateful for it would be great. You can put it on the refrigerator door for example and everyday you wake up, look at that list. Say those things on your list, whisper them or just say them in your thoughts.

Meditate

Meditation increase awareness, reduces stress and anxiety. There are many many benefits
in this area. There are thousands of books available about it and you don’t need any equipment to start at all. Internet is full of free meditation lessons and videos so everything you need to know is only couple of clicks away.

To start, you can sit whenever you please, close your eyes and just be. Be aware of your breath, your heartbeat and everything you are. But don’t grasp to anything. If your mind starts to wonder you can always return to your breath and this way you will start to notice incredible things about yourself. Focus on the present moment.

 

Learn to know yourself

Meditation helps with this area. Often people are reacting through their emotions. We are thinking that we are the mind we are living in. But the truth is that you are not your thoughts. You are the witness behind those thoughts. You are witnessing them. There are lot of books available in this area, which helps you to know yourself better. Learn about your thoughts, what makes them, your ego, your emotions. Start to be aware of your emotions. Why are you feeling this way? Learn about the chains in our minds and the dangers of ego.

Start reading books about it

My first touch to self development books was when my friend borrowed me one of the books of Wayne Dyer. I was struggling with depression and lack of motivation back then. The book gave me much knowledge. But when I finished the book, the philosophy and motivation that came with it kind of faded away and I was going down again. But that was my first experience with these kind of books. I would strongly recommend any book to you that Wayne Dyer has written. Nowadays books that are about self-help, spirituality and motivation are my thing and I will always find new things from them to be very excited about.

What about you? Do you consider yourself as a happy person?

Jonathan Green – Serve No Master Review

 

Book: Serve No Master
Author – Jonathan Green
Place To Buy: Amazon

I purchased this book a while ago and it is THE motivation booster!  Jonathan Green is an author of many bestsellers and he have became a very succesful in the world of internet. With this book amongst many other, he is offering you very valuable knowledge on leading you to the path of success. And before all, to path where you can be your own boss. Serve No Master. He is offering you tools to correct your mindset. There is so much valuable stuff on this masterpiece that you should make notes or highlight lines all the time. I use my kindle for that (because I have a kindle version).

For example Jonathan Green is revealing different revenue streams where you can take advantage of your personal skills. He is guiding you through this book all the time. Sometimes text seems like a conversation and sometimes it feels like Jonathan Green can read the readers mind. I’m thinking something when reading a specific line. And on the next sentence he is saying what I just thought. It’s kind of funny and it only tells that he has doing a lot of research about his readers.

When reading this book, me personally have found many new revenue stream ideas. This book opened my eyes totally and suddenly I don’t feel like a prisoner anymore. Now I know that I have all the power to change things.

This books offers very valuable information for anybody who wants to follow their own path to the life that is filled with passion and excitement.

People are struggling in their work. They are depended on their boss. Jonathan Green tells you how to pass that level and raise to completely another level. To the level where you have many different revenue streams and you can even make money when you are sleeping. And without boss. Yeah, I know that it’s sounds kind of too good to be true but Jonathan Green approaches this topic through his personal experiences and shares many examples from his own life. He tells how he has made his life this way. If he can, you can too. That is the mindset.

 

 

 

I need to change my life

I need to change my life for real

Are you tired to please everyone. Is your boss breathing on your neck. Do you want to get out of this hamsterwheel they call life. Human beings are like cattle with other sheeps. You are the puppet and your boss is the master. We are usually very frustrated or disappointed to our current situation. We are born in this world with pure human mind. At that second we are born we are influenced by our environment and others. We are raised to be a part of our society. Get a job, then you can afford to spend to materialistic stuff. We are manipulated to believe that happiness lies in the materialistic world. But it is false to assume that it is that way. Our minds are full with thoughts that are based on lies. These lies are based on more lies and so on.

Boss Is Grabbing My Balls

There are many people who have a job, they are staying there even they hate it. They are thinking that if they quit, they will lose everything. They are controlled by fear. It is true that leaving your job is just stupid financially if you don’t have a plan. So have a plan at least. I am wrestling with these issues as well. I hate my dayjob and this blog (among many other things) is one of the ways to get out to find my own path without a boss who is grabbing my nuts and I feel like screaming. I’m trying to be positive but it doesn’t always carry a fruit.

We are too feared to pursue our dreams and we let others to affect into our minds with their negative attitude. We got to let others be and be on our own way to the place where we can be bosses of our own mind.

Just focus on what you’re doing. I am not perfect either and I am fighting with these same issues as you. This blog is like a therapy to me. I am kind of advising myself and let my mind be my guide. And I’m filling my mind with knowledge which I find in many self help motivational books and experiences.

So what should I do

First of all, if you have a dayjob you dislike and you can’t just quit without a plan I suggest you to start studying on your own time about things you are willing to do and put it to work. Put it into work and see what happens. Make goals. If you don’t have enough time, make time. If you can set your mind straight miracles will happen. If you want something hard enough it can bee seen through your actions.

What about you?

How To Schedule Your Time

Lately, I have tried to read a lot about time management and how to schedule your chores. There are limited hours a day so if you want to accomplish as much as possible in short time, It’s good to have a plan. But there is a big BUT here:

I have noticed through my personal experiences, that trying to plan my comings and goings produce just more stress. When I am in a middle of something, I’m thinking about my next task already. Yes, everything starts to feel like a task for me. And suddenly I notice that I don’t get satisfaction anymore about things I used to love. Everything is like I have to succeed and make my day perfect. I understand that many of these books surrounding the topic are offering help to schedule your time but more than often the output is too stressful. I get this feeling that I should be like a robot and calculate everything I do. This also leads to living in the future and that is a state that everyone should avoid.

I also realized that I have too much things I want to do and accomplish. Because of the limited hours of time, they are fighting against each other. Should I do this, should I do that. Should I sleep less so I can do more. Western society is based on success, according to many people. But what is success. Basically it’s just in our heads.

But if you want to manage your time without overwhelming stress, here is my three little tips:


Remember to breath

Don’t fill your calendar with too many tasks. Think what you really want to do and focus on it. Go to the quiet place, to the beach, to the forest. Be there until you realize what is your passion. Think. This helps according to some people. Also meditate. Even a short moment in a day is causing good results. You don’t have to get into it too much if it takes a big slice of your time. You can just sit still and be. If your mind starts to wonder you can focus on your breath again and just BE. Don’t overdo either. You will burn out sooner or later that way. Keep at least one day a week, when you are doing just what you want. Dedicate it to relaxing. Go to the movies, play videogames or whatever you like to do.

Focus your energy

If somebody says something offensive to you don’t let it ruin your day. If you start to dwell in it, it will reduce your energy. You get tired faster. Try to ignore it and move on. This doesn’t mean that you are letting the other one win if you don’t say something offensive back to him/her. You are the winner when you don’t give away the key to your own peace of mind.

The universal law is this: positivity causes more positivity and negativity causes more negativity. I know it’s difficult to be positive all the time, but you can start by reading self help books about spirituality or start meditating.

Get up earlier

Do you feel that you don’t have enough time to do what you want to. If you have a dayjob and evenings are booked as well, you can try to get up earlier. You can dedicate that time to things you love. Write, meditate, play guitar, go jogging or whatever you like. If you are not a morning person you can practice that. Take a cold shower and drink coffee. There are no morning persons and evening persons. It’s all in your head. It only takes a different attitude to things.


Do you manage your time? How do you do it without getting stressed? Feel free to give a comment.